Chloe’s family was in the circuit work, but her family also had a lot of pressure in the house, pressure that she’ll describe in a way that will put you right there, pressure that perhaps you felt in your home if you too had a particularly volatile parent. Chloe, like so many, lived a double life and ended up getting married young to another JW. Today she shares custody of her daughter with that JW and at my request she provides some really amazing advice for others in that situation. There are a lot of things here that I’m sure you’ll relate to on some level.
Special music by Secret Cigarettes and Cats To Whip.
Resources mentioned include the book “I’m Perfect You’re Doomed”, the exjw reddit, and the podcast called This JW Life (particularly the episode about the FOG and cult tactics).
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Music by Fair Voyeur entitled “No Hell Yet”.
Chloe, your words and experience resonated with me. I also have a daughter and really value your advice.
I need friends like you! Thank you for sharing!
Hi Choe. Thank you for the podcast. I really loved hearing your story.
Can I particularly say thank you for the advice you gave out around allowing your child to make their own choices and affirming this to your daughter. This is so empowering for a child to hear and is nothing but a positive thing in their lives.
Also, on your comments about not getting into a slanging match with your ex spouse. You are entirely correct that this makes a child feel like they are defective or bad in some way.
It also puts a massive burden on a child in regard to side taking which a child should not have to think about but naturally will do in the situation you describe where parents are at odds with each other in a separation.
I work for a parental helpline here in Scotland and the way you described dealing with your daughter in this situation is EXACTLY the way that we’re trained to try to get parents to think about. It was so great to have this affirmed in a real life situation where it has obviously worked for you all.
I think your advice will really help people. Good for you for telling it straight. 👍🏽
Thanks to Mike as always for the podcast.
I have just recently begun to listen to this podcast and absolutely love the light and TRUTH that is presented by these authentic accounts.
I have family that practiced this religion very dedicatedly during my childhood and during a very vulnerable time in my adolescence, I also fell for the rhetoric they present.
I am currently in a relationship where my girlfriend’s family are all JW’s. It has brought up many issues through out the relationship and past 5 years of the relationship.
Listening to Chloe’s experience really was impactful to me on how I want to be more compassionate towards the group that lacks compassion for others.
Thank you for sharing this and wish Chloe and her family all the best!
My name is Nathan. I am Chloë’s husband, and as a worldly fellow who has always been as such I had and have a ton of things to learn about what her experience in life was that lead her to me. I just wanted to thank Mike especially because it was helpful to hear another perspective and correlate the experience he had on his JW life podcast with Chloë’s. It sounds so unbelievable that a rational mind is thinking clearly there must be SOME kind of exaggeration in this, when in fact there was none at all.
Your pod cast empowered me to be a better husband and give Chloë the empathy she needs. Now this pod cast has given my wonderful wife confidence as she nears the date of her first performance art piece. You’ve given my family and I a wonderful gift.
Hi Nathan! Very cool to see a comment from you! I’m happy to have been able to add perspective to what seem like unbelievable stories through corroboration. As a guy that was once a husband lacking empathy myself as the cult is the antithesis of the quality, I’m super happy to be able to help someone else add a layer or two to their empathy. Being a part of the lives of the guests on the podcast and getting to know people that I’ve never met is special to me, and I’m glad that it means something to others as well. (Also, I had fun including your music in the episode.)
Take care of one another and I hope her performance goes amazingly,
Mike