If you’ve ever watched the show Seinfeld then you know that sometimes spite is a good motivator. In Jared’s case, spite motivated him to attend Ministerial Training School, an exclusive school for Jehovah’s Witnesses that taught men to lead congregations in various ways. Find out how that went for him, how he got there in the first place, and why he is now telling his story.
The song that Jared chose to represent his journey is Doses & Mimosas by Cherub.
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This podcast was made possible by my original podcast This JW Life. You can find it on any podcast app or on YouTube. It is a 9 part series about life as Jehovah’s Witnesses designed to help you understand how it worked in one comprehensive story and to help you process your own if you came from that environment.
Music provided by Jane and the Boy, entitled Save Myself.
I really enjoyed hearing your story. Thanks for sharing!
Hi Jared! I’m glad you shared your experience because I feel the similarities culture wise and the experience of having to navigate through this world with so much going on at home. It seems like you had quite a bit of opportunities which you took to like fish to water. You are a very fortunate person having family that clearly loved you and your siblings, and who parented the best way possible under unfortunate circumstances. I too am the only one with five half siblings. I have two identical twin brothers that are twelve years older than me. Three sisters, 10 and 7 years older and one 9 years younger. All live in Texas. The first four were from one dad who seems to have been a violent person when drunk. I was brought up in a very dysfunctional narcissistic family mixed with JWs. I was given my siblings last name and things were going to go on as usual by sweeping reality under the rug which didn’t surprisingly work out. I met my biological father at 30, the same year I was baptized and the same year I was coerced by the JW hospital liaison committee to support my aunt while she (a JW) died because she refused or was coerced not to take a blood transfusion while battling leukemia in her pat 40’s. I later learned my father literally had a stroke from the shock. I had a full blown nervous breakdown at 35. My then husband of 15 years (not a JW), took a turn and started drinking again. I was forced to get a protective order and a divorce. I also found refuge the two years prior, we lived in Austin, with a congregation that was a stepping stone for me. I feel I could write a book, so I journal when possible. My story is pretty long, but I will say that I had a second chance. I’m PIMO and I feel like I’m teaching my counselor what I’m going through without receiving the empathy or the tools to function. It’s pretty frustrating not to have someone who I can reach out that can relate. Major Depression and Generalized anxiety are the monsters that I deal with everyday. Anyway, thank you for sharing and if you want, feel free to reach out when possible.
Hi Jared,
Man, I have so many questions that I’d want to ask you. I was just disfellowshipped last week for going to a “gay” nude beach several times. I had never had sex with men (even though I wanted to). I desperately want to be with a man but feel compelled to get reinstated as soon as possible because I’ve been indocrinated to believe that I will be destroyed if I don’t return.
How are you able to live a gay life and not feel guity or condemned? I ask because the prohibition against homosexuality comes from the Bible itself and not from some stupid man-made rules made by the organization (like not being able to sport a beard). Do you not believe in the Bible anymore? Are you atheist now? Atheism is not an option for me, as I absolutely cannot accept the idea that the amazing design in nature came about by random chance. I do have some doubts about the Bible, but I’m not at a place where I could give up my belief in it either.
I want to live authentically, and I’m a bit jealous that you are out and open, as I wish I was. But, at this point, I don’t see any way out. I feel like I will never be able to be truly happy. If I live a gay life, I will feel condemned. If I live the JW life, I will never be able to satisfy my deep needs for male intimacy. I feel trapped.
I’m glad you have found a comfortable place for yourself.